When the right thing feels like heartbreak
Inspired by the Bhagavad Gita Chapter 1 – Arjuna Vishada Yoga
As Arjuna watched the battlefield filled with faces, he loved, his courage slipped quietly out of him. These weren’t enemies; they were teachers, friends, cousins. The bow in his hand suddenly felt heavier than the war itself. The line between right and wrong blurred. All that remained was an ache, and heart split between love and duty. He is supposed to fight his own. Suddenly, the war isn’t about kingdoms anymore. It’s about conscience.
“I see no good in killing my own people… How can victory bring happiness?” (Gita 1.31 – 32)
He knows what’s right – he just can’t feel good doing it.
His mind knows the answer; his heart refuses to obey.
And that, right there, is the burnout of being human.
The Modern Battlefield
No one calls it Kurukshetra anymore.
It’s just another Monday.
You open your inbox and realize you have to send performance feedback that might crush someone’s confidence.
You know it’s fair. You also know it’ll hurt.
Or you’re a parent. You say no to your kid’s late night phone time.
They storm off, slam the door, declare you the “worst.”
You know the rulebook says, “Be consistent,’ but your heart whispers, “Just this once, let it slide.” You’re enforcing boundaries, and yet, somehow, you feel like the villain in your own home. That’s the Arjuna moment – not the doing, but the inner argument before the doing.
Or maybe it’s quieter – a close friend drifts away.
You know giving them space is the right thing to do, but each time you stop yourself from texting, it feels like losing a limb.
That’s the modern Kurukshetra – small wars fought in offices, homes, and hearts. Where doing the right thing still stings.
When compassion collides with duty
Arjuna’s problem wasn’t confusion – it was attachment.
He cared too much and couldn’t separate the person from the role, the love from the responsibility.
We do it too.
We carry our hearts into every decision – because how do you not care about people?
But somewhere between empathy and accountability, we burn out.
We like to think clarity makes decisions easier, but when the mind and heart start arguing, clarity just becomes noise.
So, what do you do when duty hurts?
Here’s where the Gita is practical – and surprisingly modern.
Admit it’s supposed to hurt.
Pain doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong – it means you’re human. Arjuna didn’t hide behind bravado; he said, “My mind reels.”
You can do the same. Tell a trusted friend, or just say it out loud: “This feels awful.” That honesty is the first healing.
Anchor to the WHY.
When your heart rebels, zoom out. Ask: What is this serving?
You’re not firing someone; you’re protecting the team. By saying NO, you’re saying YES to balance. Clarity doesn’t make the moment easier – it just helps you stay steady through it.
Detach guilt from responsibility.
It’s possible to feel sad and still be right. Doing what’s right often won’t feel good, and that’s okay.
The Bigger Lesson
We imagine courage as loud – speeches, declarations, victory poses. But sometimes, courage is just closing your laptop after a hard call, sitting in silence, and reminding yourself you did what you had to.
It’s choosing truth over ease. That’s growth stretching your soul.
Next time you’re caught in an “Arjuna moment,” try this.
Write down one sentence that begins with “If I don’t do this, what will it cost?”
You’ll know your why in seconds. Courage doesn’t silence doubt; it just moves anyway.
Closing Reflection
We talk a lot about peace of mind. But maybe peace isn’t always quiet or light. Sometimes, it’s just knowing you did the right thing, even when it weighed on you.
The Gita never asks Arjuna to stop feeling.
Because real balance isn’t choosing between heart or mind – it’s about learning to carrying both, and still moving forward.
Ever faced a decision that left you proud and guilty at the same time?
Share your Arjuna moment below – someone out there is fighting the same quiet battle.
Written by Vibhor Jain © 2025 | Originally published at mindspringlife.com
This is really beautiful. I am glad this article did not just talk about the problem but also gave a solution on how to tackle it. I had a moral dilemma along similar lines today and this gave me an answer.
Thank you for sharing that. I’m glad it reached you at the right moment. We all go through those dilemmas, and sometimes just putting words to them helps us see things a little clearer.
Very well said and written. I think very helpful, especially for new managers struggling between ‘feel good or do right’, ‘happy now or greater good’. I want to take it one step forward, I think the more modern work environment is a reverberation of “ how do I choose between bad and worse”, while choosing between the right and wrong is about the instant pain or the long term happiness or guit-free, now it’s more about the even larger picture.
Goods thoughts mate!
Thanks, mate 🙂 that’s such a solid point. You’re right, it’s rarely a clean choice between right and wrong anymore. Most days it’s about picking the path that feels a little less wrong and still moves things forward – even if not everyone agrees.
This topic is so relatable to me, as I constantly experience a conflict between my heart and mind. Drawing boundaries has helped me in such situations, and this solution is really about balancing what your mind and heart say. I also want to take away your thought about knowing your why and practicing it consciously.
That’s such a thoughtful takeaway. Finding that balance between what the heart feels, and the mind knows is never easy, and your point on boundaries is spot on – it’s what keeps both in sync. Really glad the piece resonated with you.
Dropping my daughter to her preschool is my Arjuna moment. 🙂
Every morning she cries her heart out, and it tears me apart. A part of me wants to scoop her up and take her back home, to safety and comfort. But I remind myself that this pain is part of her growth, her first step toward learning to socialise and find her own little world outside mine.
It’s that daily tug-of-war between heart and reason!
On a different note, this blog is beautifully written! The way it connects the Mahabharata to our everyday battles, especially the struggles of a parent, really hit home.
That’s such a touching example and one so many parents will relate to. That everyday tug between protecting and letting go is its own little battlefield. Really appreciate you sharing that, it brings the idea to life
I really like the format in which the timeless tale seamlessly transitions to current-day realities. I’m looking forward to reading more such bite-sized write-ups.
Thank you. That’s exactly what I hope to do with these pieces – keep the essence timeless but the context real. Glad you enjoyed the format 🙂 more coming soon